The Theory of Interpersonal Skills

Category: How to better Communication 3 Comments »



Tai Tran's Lab: Technology As Innovator




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Last update May 16, 2007

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    The Expat in Vietnam

    Category: How to better Communication 4 Comments »

    Dear friend,

    If you are working and living in Vietnam as an expatriate expert, please try not to be shocked when…

    People are two hours late!

    Many Vietnamese are late for meetings, appointments, schedule and get-togethers, especially weddings. It’s very usual that you receive a wedding invitation at 5pm, and it only starts after 7pm. While being late for work activities is absolutely not good, I may explain the case of the wedding. Weddings, more than an official announcement ritual, are chances for relatives of the couple’s large families to meet with and get updated about others. Poverty, digital divide, telecommunication constraints have made communication so hard that these chance are precious. If it happens that you arrive at exact 5pm, spend the time gossiping with other people – you already knew Vietnamese are friendly. On the positive side, enjoy the slow pace of life in this tropical country!

    Fortunately, more and more Vietnamese people practice the basic etiquette of punctuality.

    People ride their bikes like flying mosquitoes!

    I’m serious here. 13,000 people are reported fatal victims of traffic accidents annually. Please be very careful with traffic. Don’t go on motor-taxi if the rider is not trusted. Moreover, buses might not be as safe and comfortable like in more developed countries, but it’s still safe enough to travel by.

    You go out with your workmates and they hand you the bill.

    It is Vietnamese culture that the seniority pays the bill. Vietnamese peers also take turn paying the bills for coffee shops or light break. FYI, more Vietnamese go Dutch. If you’re not sure, just ask – and simply be prepared for most cases.

    Shopkeepers charge you your arm and leg

    Remember to bargain! One third of the proposed price is reasonable. Also, go with a Vietnamese friend, or go shopping in supermarkets.

    People eat ‘gross’ food…

    …like pig skin, chicken claw, kidneys, small intestine, insects, or reptiles. Even ‘nuoc mam’ (fish sauce), mam (salted fish) or durian taste horrible.
    Also, many Vietnamese share the same bowl of soup and the same dish of sauce.
    It’s natural in this country. If you’re not comfortable, speak it out so your co-workers know how to order more familiar food and a separate dish of sauce for you.

    People find it hard to say ‘No’

    Most of the time the reply to your questions with negative element like “This isn’t correct, is it?” is the pleasant “Yes”. While in English language, the ‘Yes’ answer means that the information being communicated is correct, it is different in Vietnamese language. When Vietnamese say “Yes”, it can be literally translated to English as “Yes, I agree with what you say”. Linguistics researchers point out that the root of the difference lies in the fact that Vietnamese language is more human-focused, and English language might be more information-focused.

    It’s observable that a few Vietnamese respond the same way English normally do.
    When you’re aware of this, please select the best way of speaking that allows you to have the answer you expect.

    People avoid losing face

    This can be sensitive. Please take any tactical steps to overcome the glitch in communication in order not to make any unnecessary cultural shock to both sides.

    People tend to overuse English words in their conversation

    Especially in the workplace of foreign-owned sector. The only reason is that many terms have not had the corresponding Vietnamese word. It’s not something to make a fuss over, as long as we find it convenient for our works.




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    Last update April 10, 2007

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    Knowledge out of a link

    Category: How to better Communication No Comments »

    Dear friends,

    You have my appreciation for your tireless efforts to keep me up to date with your super cool web links. I have a modest gift back

    How to make your link tempting

    A link is a message that you want to convey to your trusted recipients. Sending a naked link is equivalent to sending raw, meaningless bytes of data. It’s better to treat your message in grace!

    I’d advise to include a subject/description/abstract of the information contained within the link.

    The additional information determines whether a non-free recipient would open the link. My apologize I tend to ignore naked links when boiled under all the pressure.

    The subject should be

    • Meaningful
    • Relevant to the recipient or the relationship between the sender (you) with the recipient
    • Descriptive and informative
    • Silly-free. Subjects like “this is hot” or “come in to see” are what I consider silly
    • Wherever possible, include language-specific notations. For example, you would want to type Vietnamese with accents.
    • Avoid virus-like tempting invitations. BTW, most of virus invitations I received recently are stupid if not even, pardon me, illiterate.

    By adding the advised information, you have made your link from raw data to becoming meaningful, human-friendly information.

    —————————————————————

    Above is a simple tip in the form of a quick fix. Now, I guess you’d love to you’re your message personalized.

    An all-but-trendily-crazy-word: blog it!

    Societies realized the power of blogs. People read and comment blogs. The best way of republishing a message in your own personalized, characterized way is to blog it with your own analysis, reflection, evaluation, and solutions where appropriate.

    By blogging, you have transformed the human-connecting information into powerful individual-in-a-solid-community knowledge.

    Utilize web services to their best. Knowledge sharing, not data transmitting!




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    Last update February 23, 2007

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